Weds 8/22 PM and Thurs 8/23 - Hospital
Weds night
(9:15PM)
Very tired. Hoping, well, worrying about that CAT Scan. It is done so I have no control over how it comes out. Have a bad feeling about the liver & colon. So tired.
I'm afraid some doctor's gonna come in here and tell me I'm dying.
(11:55PM...almost midnight!)
"Jeanette," the nurse tried to wake me gently.
I stirred as she continued.
"The doctor wants you to have a procedure tomorrow."
A procedure! My mind raced. What did they find? What was this new worry they concocted?
"It's called a trans-esophogeal echocardiogram. You need to sign this consent form."
Oh that!
"Yeah," I mumbled, sitting up. "I know about that."
"No food or drink after midnight."
"Yeah, they told me. Anything on the CAT Scan?"
She said no.
I had slept for only an hour. Maybe I should check if the vampire is coming for her usual 1am feeding. I guess I'll walk up to the front desk to offer my arm early. My roommate is watching some violent TV show.
The nurse just came by to check my roommates IV battery. She tells me no vampires tonight. Gave her something to do...look up info on this second antibiotic they've been giving me. Got info on the first one yesterday. Looks like it treats every STD under the sun. Eeeew!
Thursday 8/23 (8:50am)
Very weak. Diarrhea is a side effect of 3 of the medicines I'm on (two different antibiotics and my old friend Neupogen). Lost count of how many times I've gone already.
My nervousness about the CAT Scan isn't helping. My intestines get messed up when I'm nervous.
I'm afraid the infectious disease doc will come up with some other procedure. I don't trust her that way since she sprung this TEE test on me. What if she wants to investigate my colon? Then again, it's a volatile area and maybe they won't want to mess around in there.
I just want to go home and crash on my own couch.
My roommate just ordered one of everything on the breakfast menu. Heck, I'm just happy she's keeping food down now. It's no fun to listen to someone else throwing up when you're nauseous yourself.
As for her breakfast, I guess I'll just walk by and enjoy the wonderful aroma---again.
It's very hard to not feel despair.
(9:05am)
Roommate is short of breath. I rang for the nurse and a couple of them showed up. She'll be ok. The nurses are great here.
One told me my TEE test is at 11am. I hope they let me eat after that. I've heard my esophagus will be sore after the test. I just hope they put me our so I don't gag.
Roommate's doing better. She has a friend visiting. Sounds like a complaint session.
(1:06pm)
My cellmate has been paroled. Good for her. We wished each other luck.
A nurse installed a "PICC line" around 10 am so I can have IV antibiotics at home. They still need to come xray it. It went in right along the bend of my elbow in the inner arm. It was a "sterile" procedure so it took her like 45 minutes to set up, complete w/mask, gloves and that blue operating room gown. She assured me the massive needles were just to draw the numbing medicine, etc, from the bottles and that she'd use smaller ones for the procedure.
Yes, it hurt. Guess I should offer it up for my sins. That's the stock answer for Catholics.
She had to tape my hand down, extended like Jesus on the cross. I'm sure crucifixion is worse so I shouldn't complain. The actual procedure was over quickly...5-10 minutes.
Immediately following, they took me down for the TEE test. They put all kinds of jumper cables on my chest to monitor the heart. I laid on my side. I had to swallow some goo to numb my throat they they sprayed my throat twice with some numbing spray. I have observed that everything that's supposed to numb you burns the neck first.
The nurse supposedly gave me 2 shots of a sedative but I was wide awake when they shoved the garden hose down my throat.
"Breathe through your nose and swallow when the doctor says swallow."
Right. Guess I did OK. Coughed a few times but tried to get my mind straight. If I screwed it up, the test would just take longer.
I hoped I didn't tick off the nurse when I asked her to scrub her hands and give me a new mouthpiece earlier. She opened it with her bare hands and said it was going in my mouth. Nope! She was nice about it though. She was in her mid-fifties, blonde with heavy eye makeup. She'd probably seen it all. I was apologetic but insistent, as you have to be.
(By the way, the phlebotomy manager apologized personally and brought me flowers for the unsanitary blood draw I had the other night. Whatever. I still hope I'm not here tonight, as that chick works again.)
OK. So the TEE result showed "no vegetation on the heart." Eeew! Since a doctor did the test, he was able to tell me right then, during the test.
Still FREAKING OUT about the CAT Scan.
There was a loud patient across the hall during my test. The slim Hawaiian nurse took his verbal abuse for a while then made a phone call. I think they sedated his belligerent ass because in a short time he was saying, "Oh yeah!" every time a nurse passed by. He was now in the hall after his test. Then he ordered a steak and potatoes from someone walking by! She assured him they were making his steak when she passed by again. He discovered a phone next to his gurney.
"Do you have a directory?" he asked no one in particular.
Then he dialed and ordered "a ground round, a big one" and "a six pack of pop" from whomever answered.
The Hawaiian nurse had returned to the room and I caught her eye with a smile and a puzzled look. She smiled back nd shook her head.
(1:40pm)
Nurse just came in to hook up my antibiotic. I get them at 6am, 2pm and 10pm. Hope I'm not still here at 10pm. Shared the alone story with her. She got a kick out of it. She says I'm getting a new roommate, an older lady.
"Is she half dead or what?" I asked.
"No, I don't think so," she reassured me.
I should order lunch.
I'm so afraid they won't release me today. No sign of any doctors yet. Hope the infectious disease doc does not pull another test out of her hat.
(1:50pm)
This sucks! The kitchen won't feed me! I'm still "NPO" they said. It's some Latin term for "nothing by mouth". i told them I had my test but they didn't believe me. They said the floor has to tell them it's OK. I went whining to the nurse.
(1:55pm)
Ordered food.
(2:10pm)
The nurse was wrong. This roommate doesn't look so good.
(6:50pm)
They've beaten me. I'm a shell of a woman. I got trapped in my room while they gave that poor woman Last Rites. The hospice rep was working hard to get her some serious pain meds. (The rep came to my bed first and I almost jumped out of my skin seeing "HOSPICE" on her shirt) I prayed with the family from behind the curtain then respectfully escaped to the hallway when the priest was done. She's still alive (ovarian cancer of a mass blocking her colon).
I sat in the hall talking to the family while the nurses performed some horrific procedure where they relieved bowel pressure by a tube inserted through the nose down in tot he stomach and beyond, with suction! How that poor old woman screamed.
Then came my CAT Scan results. More bone metastases with some type of thickening in the colon. The doc told me by the nurses desk.
I asked the doctor, "Did they compare it to the bone scan of April 20th?"
His dark eyes got wide.
"That's an excellent question," he got up immediately.
They used my Nov '05 PET/CT Scan. We already know I've had more bone mets since then.
So I'll need another bone scan for comparative purposed then a colonscopy. Great.
They've beaten me.
I am going home tonight. After much hard work, the case manager was able to arrange a home care nurse to come by tomorrow.
I'll get 2 weeks of antibiotics at home, twice a day 2 1/2 hours each time.
My culture from the other day still needs to incubate for 5 more days to see if anything grows. They'll monitor my blood counts, kidney function, etc. I have to watch for fever, excessive diarrhea (MORE than now?) etc.
I am defeated, totally drained. I was a strong and vital women when I cam in here. Now I am a shell.
(7:25pm)
They moved the old woman. Dr. V, my infectious disease doc said she told them not to put her in my room in the first place.
New roommate #2 just arrived. Metastatic lung cancer, 44 years old, just diagnosed. She's very upset but I can tell she still has a lot of mileage left in her. Two young children. They're not here but 2 weeping relatives are.
My friends, if you smoke, I BEG you to thrown that poison away.
(9:15PM)
Very tired. Hoping, well, worrying about that CAT Scan. It is done so I have no control over how it comes out. Have a bad feeling about the liver & colon. So tired.
I'm afraid some doctor's gonna come in here and tell me I'm dying.
(11:55PM...almost midnight!)
"Jeanette," the nurse tried to wake me gently.
I stirred as she continued.
"The doctor wants you to have a procedure tomorrow."
A procedure! My mind raced. What did they find? What was this new worry they concocted?
"It's called a trans-esophogeal echocardiogram. You need to sign this consent form."
Oh that!
"Yeah," I mumbled, sitting up. "I know about that."
"No food or drink after midnight."
"Yeah, they told me. Anything on the CAT Scan?"
She said no.
I had slept for only an hour. Maybe I should check if the vampire is coming for her usual 1am feeding. I guess I'll walk up to the front desk to offer my arm early. My roommate is watching some violent TV show.
The nurse just came by to check my roommates IV battery. She tells me no vampires tonight. Gave her something to do...look up info on this second antibiotic they've been giving me. Got info on the first one yesterday. Looks like it treats every STD under the sun. Eeeew!
Thursday 8/23 (8:50am)
Very weak. Diarrhea is a side effect of 3 of the medicines I'm on (two different antibiotics and my old friend Neupogen). Lost count of how many times I've gone already.
My nervousness about the CAT Scan isn't helping. My intestines get messed up when I'm nervous.
I'm afraid the infectious disease doc will come up with some other procedure. I don't trust her that way since she sprung this TEE test on me. What if she wants to investigate my colon? Then again, it's a volatile area and maybe they won't want to mess around in there.
I just want to go home and crash on my own couch.
My roommate just ordered one of everything on the breakfast menu. Heck, I'm just happy she's keeping food down now. It's no fun to listen to someone else throwing up when you're nauseous yourself.
As for her breakfast, I guess I'll just walk by and enjoy the wonderful aroma---again.
It's very hard to not feel despair.
(9:05am)
Roommate is short of breath. I rang for the nurse and a couple of them showed up. She'll be ok. The nurses are great here.
One told me my TEE test is at 11am. I hope they let me eat after that. I've heard my esophagus will be sore after the test. I just hope they put me our so I don't gag.
Roommate's doing better. She has a friend visiting. Sounds like a complaint session.
(1:06pm)
My cellmate has been paroled. Good for her. We wished each other luck.
A nurse installed a "PICC line" around 10 am so I can have IV antibiotics at home. They still need to come xray it. It went in right along the bend of my elbow in the inner arm. It was a "sterile" procedure so it took her like 45 minutes to set up, complete w/mask, gloves and that blue operating room gown. She assured me the massive needles were just to draw the numbing medicine, etc, from the bottles and that she'd use smaller ones for the procedure.
Yes, it hurt. Guess I should offer it up for my sins. That's the stock answer for Catholics.
She had to tape my hand down, extended like Jesus on the cross. I'm sure crucifixion is worse so I shouldn't complain. The actual procedure was over quickly...5-10 minutes.
Immediately following, they took me down for the TEE test. They put all kinds of jumper cables on my chest to monitor the heart. I laid on my side. I had to swallow some goo to numb my throat they they sprayed my throat twice with some numbing spray. I have observed that everything that's supposed to numb you burns the neck first.
The nurse supposedly gave me 2 shots of a sedative but I was wide awake when they shoved the garden hose down my throat.
"Breathe through your nose and swallow when the doctor says swallow."
Right. Guess I did OK. Coughed a few times but tried to get my mind straight. If I screwed it up, the test would just take longer.
I hoped I didn't tick off the nurse when I asked her to scrub her hands and give me a new mouthpiece earlier. She opened it with her bare hands and said it was going in my mouth. Nope! She was nice about it though. She was in her mid-fifties, blonde with heavy eye makeup. She'd probably seen it all. I was apologetic but insistent, as you have to be.
(By the way, the phlebotomy manager apologized personally and brought me flowers for the unsanitary blood draw I had the other night. Whatever. I still hope I'm not here tonight, as that chick works again.)
OK. So the TEE result showed "no vegetation on the heart." Eeew! Since a doctor did the test, he was able to tell me right then, during the test.
Still FREAKING OUT about the CAT Scan.
There was a loud patient across the hall during my test. The slim Hawaiian nurse took his verbal abuse for a while then made a phone call. I think they sedated his belligerent ass because in a short time he was saying, "Oh yeah!" every time a nurse passed by. He was now in the hall after his test. Then he ordered a steak and potatoes from someone walking by! She assured him they were making his steak when she passed by again. He discovered a phone next to his gurney.
"Do you have a directory?" he asked no one in particular.
Then he dialed and ordered "a ground round, a big one" and "a six pack of pop" from whomever answered.
The Hawaiian nurse had returned to the room and I caught her eye with a smile and a puzzled look. She smiled back nd shook her head.
(1:40pm)
Nurse just came in to hook up my antibiotic. I get them at 6am, 2pm and 10pm. Hope I'm not still here at 10pm. Shared the alone story with her. She got a kick out of it. She says I'm getting a new roommate, an older lady.
"Is she half dead or what?" I asked.
"No, I don't think so," she reassured me.
I should order lunch.
I'm so afraid they won't release me today. No sign of any doctors yet. Hope the infectious disease doc does not pull another test out of her hat.
(1:50pm)
This sucks! The kitchen won't feed me! I'm still "NPO" they said. It's some Latin term for "nothing by mouth". i told them I had my test but they didn't believe me. They said the floor has to tell them it's OK. I went whining to the nurse.
(1:55pm)
Ordered food.
(2:10pm)
The nurse was wrong. This roommate doesn't look so good.
(6:50pm)
They've beaten me. I'm a shell of a woman. I got trapped in my room while they gave that poor woman Last Rites. The hospice rep was working hard to get her some serious pain meds. (The rep came to my bed first and I almost jumped out of my skin seeing "HOSPICE" on her shirt) I prayed with the family from behind the curtain then respectfully escaped to the hallway when the priest was done. She's still alive (ovarian cancer of a mass blocking her colon).
I sat in the hall talking to the family while the nurses performed some horrific procedure where they relieved bowel pressure by a tube inserted through the nose down in tot he stomach and beyond, with suction! How that poor old woman screamed.
Then came my CAT Scan results. More bone metastases with some type of thickening in the colon. The doc told me by the nurses desk.
I asked the doctor, "Did they compare it to the bone scan of April 20th?"
His dark eyes got wide.
"That's an excellent question," he got up immediately.
They used my Nov '05 PET/CT Scan. We already know I've had more bone mets since then.
So I'll need another bone scan for comparative purposed then a colonscopy. Great.
They've beaten me.
I am going home tonight. After much hard work, the case manager was able to arrange a home care nurse to come by tomorrow.
I'll get 2 weeks of antibiotics at home, twice a day 2 1/2 hours each time.
My culture from the other day still needs to incubate for 5 more days to see if anything grows. They'll monitor my blood counts, kidney function, etc. I have to watch for fever, excessive diarrhea (MORE than now?) etc.
I am defeated, totally drained. I was a strong and vital women when I cam in here. Now I am a shell.
(7:25pm)
They moved the old woman. Dr. V, my infectious disease doc said she told them not to put her in my room in the first place.
New roommate #2 just arrived. Metastatic lung cancer, 44 years old, just diagnosed. She's very upset but I can tell she still has a lot of mileage left in her. Two young children. They're not here but 2 weeping relatives are.
My friends, if you smoke, I BEG you to thrown that poison away.
posted by Mark Kappe @ 7:17 AM
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